Silent Relationships

Only knowing a few words in the entire Czech language, I certainly can’t rely on conversation to communicate with people. I have become quite good at pointing, and I have relied very much on my facial expressions to convey thanks or gratitude. Let’s consider some of the people with whom I have “silent relationships”.

First, there is the cafeteria lady. Every day I walk up to the counter and greet her with my, “Dobry den” (Good day). That, unfortunately, is where it ends. She always hands me my meal with a big smile; I say, “Dekuji” (Thank you), and off I go. One day was different, however. I went up for my meal, and as she was getting my food, she stopped and looked at me, pointed to my earring and said, “Gold!” Well, it didn’t take a genius to figure out she was complimenting me, so I said, “Ano” (Yes) and “Dekuji”. Let me be honest and say my earrings were by no means real gold, but she was trying to pay me a compliment in what little way she could, and to me it was very special.

Then there is the snack bar lady. Once or twice I week I come in the snack bar and point to my standard sandwich and say, “Syr (Cheese) Prosim (Please)”. Unfortunately, it doesn’t rhyme in Czech like it does in English. For whatever reason, I can’t seem to count my money correctly at this snack bar, and she has several times had to grab my attention after I’ve started to walk away so she could give me back my money. I laugh and she does too.

There are also the one-time visits with kind people. On one wintry day I walked into my apartment building, and as I stood waiting for the elevator, a lady said something to me in Czech. I whipped out my slick line, “Nemluvim cesky” (I don’t speak Czech.) It was interesting, because most people simply look away when I say that. She, however, was so cute. She pointed outside, folding her arms together (like when you are cold) and said, “Brrr!!!” Now that is a language I understand! “Ano!” I said, and we laughed.

I remember when I was leaving Prague to go home for Christmas this past December. My suitcase was so heavy, I struggled dragging it all the way from my flat to the airport, which is about an hour’s worth of distance on public transportation, maybe more. I came to a staircase, and panic ran through me as I had no idea how I was going to lift it. Tossing a quick prayer up to heaven, I proceeded to lift my suitcase with both hands, one step at a time, and letting my arms rest with each step. A nice man came along and said something in Czech, grabbed one end of my suitcase, and helped me carry it up. Without him, I don’t think I would have been able to do it. Since I could only say, “Dekuji” instead of “Thank you so much! I couldn’t have done it without you,” or whatever other words I would have been inclined to express, I could only give him an intent look and a big smile to let him know I really appreciated it.

I am glad that smiles and laughter are a universal language. I rely on them to convey gratitude, respect, and appreciation.

Here are some students of mine with whom silence is no issue; they have plenty to say in English. From left to right: Radka, Anna, Lucie, Lucie, me, and Marketa. They recently came over to my flat for "Girls' Night", a concept I had to explain to them because they didn't understand why I wanted to spend time just with them and not the boys, too. I love these girls! They are amazing!

Home Sweet New Jersey

I thought it was high time I taught my students a little bit about my stomping grounds, so today in class I presented them with some info about New Jersey. I gave them a role-play activity, in which several students were the travel agents, and they each had information about a particular New Jersey location they had to share with the other students, the travelers. It was a simple lesson, really, but I can't tell you how it made me smile. As I walked around the classroom listening in on their conversations, it was funny to hear my students talk about the places that I know, for example, "Seaside Heights is a great place to go. You can sit on the sand, sunbathe, or go surfing."

But what got me the most was when I heard Cyril's voice above all others. Cyril, though perhaps enjoys attention a little too much, is really a bright and creative boy who is very sweet beneath his sometimes clownish exterior. As he was speaking about Newark, I heard him say somewhat dramatically, with an arm raised in the air, "And here is where you can meet our teacher as she comes in from Europe." Perhaps I am just foolishly emotional, but I both laughed and teared up at the same time. I laughed because it was funny; I teared up because I am keenly aware that these precious moments will not last too much longer... and how I want them to!

Onward Christian Soldier

“I press on toward the goal for the prize of the upward call of God in Christ Jesus.” ~Philippians 3:14

It’s been a pretty rough week for me (both in and out of the classroom), and I’ve sort of been walking around feeling like one wounded in battle. I’ve spent this past week trying to make my decision about next year and I’ve been hurting every step of the way. For so long the decision was pretty simple, “Go home!” But something started to happen since I came back from Christmas… I felt for the first time like this was home, and the relationships that I had established with students were growing…and I wondered if perhaps a second year would provide even more ministry opportunities. (Undoubtedly, it would.) I could picture myself here again, loving new faces, and loving those I already love still more.

However, in my heart of hearts, in that deepest part of me where emotions subside and confusion dissolves, in that place where all that has been hazy suddenly become clear… I knew God was not calling me back. If He was, He would have revealed it to me by now. If He was, there would be no desperate search for an answer last minute. I look back on the times I know He has called me to do something… and I KNEW, not only within myself, but He had revealed it through my circumstances. Though a big part of me wants to return, and it does pain me to leave this place, He has called me to Prague for a season.

I do not think my time is forever done overseas. I’m not sure why I think that because I have no idea when, where, or under what circumstances He might bring me back, only that I have a heart for it.

It has been a really rough week. But God has been teaching me to "press on" no matter what my emotions may be, high or low, up or down. "Go on, Courtney. Go on, press on, continue on."

I don't know what is coming next for me, but He knows, and that's enough.